Why am I so successful?
Posted on January 28, 2009 with 4 Comments
The law of attraction is something that I used to believe in strongly. This law states simply that you will attract into reality the things you focus on. So, for example, if you often think about being single (regardless of whether you like or dislike singlehood), then you will attract singlehood and you will be single. Or, if you focus constantly on needing to lose weight, then you will always need to lose weight until your focus shifts. In theory, the law of attraction states that if you were to reframe your focus, then you could attract a different result. So if you want to lose weight, then you should instead focus on being thin, or being fit, and the shift in focus will allow you to attract thinness and fitness. Changing your thoughts may not be the only thing needed to change (indeed, diet and exercise couldn’t hurt!), but it helps.
Over the past few years, however, I’ve realized that it’s not conscious, purposeful thought that is responsible for the law of attraction, but it’s the underlying beliefs that have a real impact on reality. I can’t just say to myself, “I have the perfect body!” and expect it to happen, because I don’t really believe it. My own brain mocks me if I tell myself something like that… the running commentary in my brain would sound something like “Yeah, perfect except for those love handles, and the jiggly thighs and the 15 extra pounds around my middle. I certainly look okay, but not perfect.”
Not that I would expect my thoughts alone to give me the perfect body, but I think my beliefs about my physique have, at times, actually hindered my ability to get there. When my diet and exercise regime should have resulted in greater weight loss (based on calories burned vs. calories consumed), I still didn’t really believe it would work for me, and guess what? It didn’t work as well as it should have. My beliefs, not my affirmations, were what came true.
I know attitude plays a role in what you attract into your life. And I need to harness that power to help myself get a job. The problem has been that telling myself that I am successful, that I have money, that I will get a great job… it hasn’t worked. Why? I don’t really believe it. Right now I am not successful, and I don’t have a job or any money.
Today I learned a great trick that may help me turn my results around, and it’s so simple. It’s called “afformations” and here is the deal: because we often don’t believe our own affirmations, they don’t work. Our brains second guess themselves. But… our brains are always searching for answers. So instead of a statement that needs no answer, you should phrase your affirmation in the form of a question.
Instead of, “I have a high-paying, secure job,” (a statement that my brain would surely reject) I can ask myself, “Why am I so successful in my career?” and instantly, my brain will start searching for the answer to the question. And it might just come up with one.
Read more about afformations and how to create them over at The Positivity Blog.
Category: The quest for happiness
Have you read or watch the movie The Secret? I’m sure you have, but if not…..I watched it from a recommendation from our friends at the time. We both watched it and it took an effect on us. I was in the beginning stages or maybe middle of the “Where’s my happiness?” lie and it was a mind altering view to take. I didn’t believe it to the extremes, but like you said, it helps alot. Funny fact, I thought about really wanting the almost exact, actually exact ring if I should get engaged…and it friggin happened. I just wasn’t sure on the notion of being ready to get married, so that’s why everything else after that special moment went caputs probably. Anywho, Best of Luck! Put up photos on a board of things you really want too…it works if your heart is telling you too! I am going to post a entry on what I learned from a program about anxiety and general control.. It helped me wonders after I accepted I lacked a few of them in my life and relationships.
I love these type of afformations. I hate to say it, but usually I’m so busy putting myself down, that I don’t stop to think how it negatively affects me…
Cheryl – yup I did watch the Secret! I found it really life-changing at the time… I’ve since learned to take it with a grain of salt but I really like the concepts they present. It helped me achieve a more optimistic outlook and also helped me see why I have never been able to identify either with any organized religion, nor with the idea that there is no God at all.
Vision boards are a great idea – my sister and her best friend were making some on the weekend and I think I might make one too with their leftover supplies!
Michelle – I find it hard too. I think most women just grow up being hard on ourselves, it becomes second nature. But it really does have a negative effect so I try to change my thoughts whenever I catch myself. Besides, you are absolutely lovely so there’s no reason to be down on yourself!
Love the post. I too see the benefit in vision boards and affirmations in the form of a question is an interesting concept.