The Decade of the Aughts

Posted on December 19, 2009 with 7 Comments

Inspired by Hope Dies Last.

In 2000, I left my teenage years behind and entered my 20’s. I entered the decade asleep; I contracted a case of mononucleosis over the holidays that knocked me on my ass. Upon returning to university in January against doctor’s orders – afraid of falling behind in my schoolwork – I slept through all my classes and had to repeat the semester. I fell in love with the boy who became the boyfriend who became the yardstick against which I’ve measured all subsequent relationships. I took a job in London and moved there for what was meant to be a year, returning home after only 5 months. My time in Europe was wasted pining away for that boy in what is, to this day, one of my biggest regrets.

In 2001, I was a selfish girl who thought she knew how the world worked. Until I wasn’t; until two planes crashed into the World Trade Center and I spent a week sobbing in front of the TV news. I developed empathy.

In 2002, I took a summer job halfway up to Whistler in a place not serviced by public transit and without my own transportation. I bought a car out of necessity. Three weeks later in a fit of complete abandon, I quit my job and drove to a resort town, got another job, quit that job after another few weeks, and drove across the country to my boyfriend. I broke up with him for the first of many times 9 days after arriving.

In 2003, I finally learned that in order to get over someone you love, you cannot remain friends at first. I broke up with my boyfriend for the last time and cut off all contact with him. I graduated from university, completely terrified and exhilarated at the unknown future that lay before me, and moved back to Vancouver. I thought nobody would ever hire me for a “real” job. I went on my first date with a man who would eventually ask me to marry him out of a sense of obligation.

In 2004, someone did hire me for a real job and I started to believe I had value in the grown-up world of work. I fell in love and moved in with my future fiance, compromising everything I’d ever wanted for my own life in order to fit in with his, but I couldn’t quell the voice that told me I couldn’t trust him; I just ignored the feeling.

In 2005, while I excelled in my job, things became stagnant at home. The domestic bliss of playing house with my sweetie gave way to real life struggles: fights about the “in-laws”, disagreements about finances, exhaustion, and squabbles over whose turn it was to empty the dishwasher. The spark began to wane and was replaced with a vague sense of comfort and security. It wasn’t a good trade.

In 2006, I had learned everything I could from my job and became increasingly bored bored at work. Another company wooed me away with a brighter, shinier paycheck. That thrill lasted about five minutes into my first day. I became totally disillusioned with corporate life, and the magic disappeared entirely from my relationship, but I was in too deep a rut to notice. We got a puppy and I got the diamond ring I’d wanted so desperately, thinking it would solve all my problems.

In 2007, my new engagement incited the quiet but persistent voice inside my head to begin yelling in a panic that I was making a huge mistake. I tried to silence it by planning a beautiful wedding that nobody ever attended. I hated my job, my relationship, and my life but felt stuck. I have never felt so hopeless.

In 2008, I was unceremoniously dumped by my fiance who came to his senses and left me for another woman. I moved back in with my parents, lost my much-detested job, and was forced to climb out of the rut my life was in. I went travelling, started dating, made great friends, learned to trust my gut, and discovered that I am strong enough to hold it together no matter how overwhelmed I might be.

In 2009, I found a job in a terrible economy. I became grateful for a steady income and learned to do what is necessary for survival when it counts – and not to rely on a job for self-fulfillment. I made a difficult, life-changing decision in an awkward situation that I do not regret. I got my own apartment and I fell in love again. I lost my job again, but found another one that is so exciting, it rid me of my procrastination habit. While everyone else was complaining about how awful 2009 was, my challenges this year brought me back to life.

The next decade will bring my 30’s and for all the grumbling I do about the lines on my face, the grey hairs sprouting on my head and the spare tire settling around my midsection, I am actually welcoming it with open arms. Despite all the experiences I’ve been through this decade that have jaded me, I feel like a bright-eyed 20 year old again, ambitious and eager to see what the future holds. I can’t wait to find out.